Here's to the things that could have been, but didn't make it to my fingers let alone my lips (and hips and thighs!)
1. Pizza 12/30
2. M&M's and buttered pop corn at the movies 12/30
3. No cocktail or dessert at MiMi's tonight
4. No fudge, divinity or other goodies my Mom brought with her, all the way from
Florida
5. Number 4 repeated for 12/27-present
ahhhh.....victory tastes sweet :)
Happy New Year to you, here is to a healthy and happy lifestyle.
See you out on the pavement bright and early tomorrow, it is after all, a new day and a new year :)
About Me
- Your 31 Bag Lady
- I am starting a journey that I call "RE" which means that after listing areas that I want to change or improve, I have decided to attack them with gusto to become the Me that I want to be. True to form, I was on fire for the re-newal but started procrastinating around month three and now I have three months before the big 40 arrives. Procrastination in my middle name...or rather, Tina is procrastination's middle name. See? Right there? In the middle? Tina.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
REanalyze: just do it.
I start week two of my "Couch potato to 5K runner" Program. It just so happens that it is the coldest morning of the winter. I can hear Nike whisper..."just do it". I can hear my butt say "we are quite happy being this big...and staying in bed."
Monday, December 28, 2009
REstructure the food in my face!
I have been good. Really, I have! I have eaten right, and was even able to have a little treat tonight - popcorn (1 cup) about a 1/2 oz of fudge and a wine spritzer. It was nice to have a treat. It was nice to be filled up with that treat and not desire more. My dining room table looks like my breakroom at work after my mom plopped her homemade fudge, divinity, and other treats. But, I am OK. Really. Tomorrow morning begins week two of my training. I almost feel like I should start back on week one. I am such a perfection wanna be.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
REmember the reason.
I am always amazed at the long drawn out process of Christmas approaching. Not the true meaning of the day, the symbolic day of our Saviour's birth, the glorious celebration of the sacrifice our God made to become flesh and live amongst us, to grow and live on the earth that He made but so despised Him, to lead up to His ultimate gift to us...death on a cross to save all who would call upon His name.
No, not that Christmas. I am talking about the commercialized event. The presents, the cards, the planning, the food, the juggling of two families on the same day, and the food. Wait, did I mention the food? The lugging out of the boxes from the shed with garland and ornaments. The removal of my normal decor to make way for the festive snowmen, reindeer and Santa. The realization that you forgot a gift and the stores close in one hour. The unexpected gift from someone that you now feel pressure to buy for even though they will tell you "I didn't give a gift to you just so you would have to give one to me..."
The phone call from the hubby's fam on Christmas Eve, 7pm, that dinner is the next day at 3pm and you need to bring deviled eggs. What??! (It just so happened that I had a dozen eggs in the fridge that I could use...that was supposed to be our Christmas morning breakfast.) Then the hubby has to explain that we already have plans and have had them for weeks. Then you show up after your other family celebration has finished only to find that the second dinner is done, table is cleared and your deviled eggs, the ones you sacrificed Christmas breakfast with and crammed the hour or so that it took to make them into your already crammed day....are now, sitting on a cleared table. And, no one save one sweet precious soul, will eat them. And the hostess, has finished her dishes and gone to bed.
Yes...that one. That Christmas. Yesterday, I was thrilled to pack up every decoration. And although I grazed here and there and didn't write down my food in my WW journal, I feel confident that I still did well.
I sacrificed my health goals for a coveted piece of my mother-in-law's famous Banana Split cake. I was quite happy to do so!
No, not that Christmas. I am talking about the commercialized event. The presents, the cards, the planning, the food, the juggling of two families on the same day, and the food. Wait, did I mention the food? The lugging out of the boxes from the shed with garland and ornaments. The removal of my normal decor to make way for the festive snowmen, reindeer and Santa. The realization that you forgot a gift and the stores close in one hour. The unexpected gift from someone that you now feel pressure to buy for even though they will tell you "I didn't give a gift to you just so you would have to give one to me..."
The phone call from the hubby's fam on Christmas Eve, 7pm, that dinner is the next day at 3pm and you need to bring deviled eggs. What??! (It just so happened that I had a dozen eggs in the fridge that I could use...that was supposed to be our Christmas morning breakfast.) Then the hubby has to explain that we already have plans and have had them for weeks. Then you show up after your other family celebration has finished only to find that the second dinner is done, table is cleared and your deviled eggs, the ones you sacrificed Christmas breakfast with and crammed the hour or so that it took to make them into your already crammed day....are now, sitting on a cleared table. And, no one save one sweet precious soul, will eat them. And the hostess, has finished her dishes and gone to bed.
Yes...that one. That Christmas. Yesterday, I was thrilled to pack up every decoration. And although I grazed here and there and didn't write down my food in my WW journal, I feel confident that I still did well.
I sacrificed my health goals for a coveted piece of my mother-in-law's famous Banana Split cake. I was quite happy to do so!
Thursday, December 24, 2009
REweigh
Today has been one week since I started WW. I am down 4 pounds. So pleased :) However, my Moo Moo and Papa Joe Cool are coming and my Mommy and I do a few things really well together: Eat and Shop. Two things I must be extremely conservative in. Tune in for what is sure to be a hardy har har laugh fest!
PS Welcome Jennifer!
PS Welcome Jennifer!
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
REmember who you are first.
I was supposed to resume my training yesterday morning. I was a good girl, I woke up at 4:30 a.m. and was heading towards the pile I had made the night before of essentials: sneakers, sweats, mp3 player, when I heard a terrible and pitiful sound. My Liv was coughing and crackling out "mooooommmmmyyyyy". Poor girl. She was feverish and needed mommy. I ended up calling out from work and taking her to the doctor. We hung out on the couch most of the day watching Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer over, and over, and over, and....
This morning, Wednesday, I was up and at 'em. Out in the dark and cold I resumed my training. I cut it from 25 minutes to 15 minutes. Sunday's training felt great, until Tuesday! The aches and pains were quite nasty. So I have decided that I must be more than a couch potato...I am the couch! It was cold, and it was dark, and I ran a stretch of three houses in a circle on my street. It was boring, cold, dark, and quiet. But, I did it. I think that is becoming my mantra...
I did it.
This morning, Wednesday, I was up and at 'em. Out in the dark and cold I resumed my training. I cut it from 25 minutes to 15 minutes. Sunday's training felt great, until Tuesday! The aches and pains were quite nasty. So I have decided that I must be more than a couch potato...I am the couch! It was cold, and it was dark, and I ran a stretch of three houses in a circle on my street. It was boring, cold, dark, and quiet. But, I did it. I think that is becoming my mantra...
I did it.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
REstart
I did not start my training yesterday. I made an excuse. It was cold which is not a deterrent for me. But it was very windy and rainy. Windy is not good because it brings on the migraine. Rainy is not good because eventually I have to bring out the inhaler. However...the prospect of a migraine or small asthma attack should not thwart the actions I need to take to meet my goals. So, this morning, I am going out to run/walk. Wish me luck. Here I go. Really...any minute now. I will be back in about 35-40 minutes to let you know every windy and wet detail!
PS Welcome Jamie, thank you for your kind words and keep laughing!
(hours later)
I did it! I did it!!!!
I completed W1D1 (week one day one) in the "From Couch Potato to 5K Runner" program which is a 5 minute brisk walk (not too difficult as it was FAAAAAAreeeeezzzzingg!)and alternating 60 seconds of jogging with 90 seconds of walking for 20 minutes. Now for the expert runner or fitness fanatic this means nothing. It is probably less than their "warm up" However, for me, it was glorious! I haven't moved quicker than a brisk walk since...well, since....have I ever? I don't think so! I came home to my waiting husband who congratulated me with sweet nothings and hugs and I was so overcome with joy that I actually cried. Sweet glorious triumphant tears. Lovely waterworks. I understand that the Ugly Cry will appear later in my training!!!
I now face a dilema. My training will be three days a week with one day off in between. This means that two of my three training days will be during my work week. No problem, right? Let me describe my morning routine.
6:00 a.m. roll out of bed after hitting the snooze button every 7 minutes for 45 minutes. Talk myself out of washing my hair so that I could sleep a bit longer. Coffee and quiet time with Jesus (no playing around here, an absolute necessity and thrill). Then I get dressed quickly, put on my face and wake up Olivia. She requires the potty chair (I must be present with tissue in hand) then chocolate milk and an episode of Olivia (15 minutes). Then, I dress her, grab her lunch, my lunch, my work bag, her coat, hat, mittens, and start the car. The dogs, at some point during the morning, have had to be taken out and then brought back in. Charlie requires physical help getting up and down the stairs and a trail of rubber mats from the door to the office where she resided during the day. There are not enough mats so we grab what she just came off of and run ahead of her to lay it down in time for her to get to her bed. Whew. Then, I grab the child and buckle her in, grab my breakfast and throw into the car. Make sure the t.v. is off, the Christmas lights are off, that the dogs are seperated and that the cat did not hide in Charlie's room (chinese food anyone?) and jump in the car for at least a 45 minute commute to Olivia's preschool. This requires more special attention as we must go potty first, wash the hands second, and push her into the class room where she has conveniently forgotten how much she adores her teachers and enjoys her friends. This can be anywhere from 5 minutes to 15 minutes or so....then peel off to work. Whew. Too bad it isn't actually as much of an aerobic activity as it sounds cause I would be skinny minnie!
In order to fit in two training days during the week I must either get up way early...(I am talking 4:45 a.m. cause the hubby leaves at 5:15 a.m. and someone has to watch the child!).
OR....
Do this on my 45 minute lunch hour. Where? I don't know. I can't jog in the mall, they might think I am stealing. On the street? OK...maybe, but I am not sure my co-workers would enjoy the earthy sweatty scent of me after my run.
OR....
in the evening after I get home which is just the backward routine of the above earlier described routine...plus, my neighborhood is not lit and there are no sidewalks and there are loose junk yard dogs...and...need I go on?
I think my only option is to get up early. sigh. cry.
PS Welcome Jamie, thank you for your kind words and keep laughing!
(hours later)
I did it! I did it!!!!
I completed W1D1 (week one day one) in the "From Couch Potato to 5K Runner" program which is a 5 minute brisk walk (not too difficult as it was FAAAAAAreeeeezzzzingg!)and alternating 60 seconds of jogging with 90 seconds of walking for 20 minutes. Now for the expert runner or fitness fanatic this means nothing. It is probably less than their "warm up" However, for me, it was glorious! I haven't moved quicker than a brisk walk since...well, since....have I ever? I don't think so! I came home to my waiting husband who congratulated me with sweet nothings and hugs and I was so overcome with joy that I actually cried. Sweet glorious triumphant tears. Lovely waterworks. I understand that the Ugly Cry will appear later in my training!!!
I now face a dilema. My training will be three days a week with one day off in between. This means that two of my three training days will be during my work week. No problem, right? Let me describe my morning routine.
6:00 a.m. roll out of bed after hitting the snooze button every 7 minutes for 45 minutes. Talk myself out of washing my hair so that I could sleep a bit longer. Coffee and quiet time with Jesus (no playing around here, an absolute necessity and thrill). Then I get dressed quickly, put on my face and wake up Olivia. She requires the potty chair (I must be present with tissue in hand) then chocolate milk and an episode of Olivia (15 minutes). Then, I dress her, grab her lunch, my lunch, my work bag, her coat, hat, mittens, and start the car. The dogs, at some point during the morning, have had to be taken out and then brought back in. Charlie requires physical help getting up and down the stairs and a trail of rubber mats from the door to the office where she resided during the day. There are not enough mats so we grab what she just came off of and run ahead of her to lay it down in time for her to get to her bed. Whew. Then, I grab the child and buckle her in, grab my breakfast and throw into the car. Make sure the t.v. is off, the Christmas lights are off, that the dogs are seperated and that the cat did not hide in Charlie's room (chinese food anyone?) and jump in the car for at least a 45 minute commute to Olivia's preschool. This requires more special attention as we must go potty first, wash the hands second, and push her into the class room where she has conveniently forgotten how much she adores her teachers and enjoys her friends. This can be anywhere from 5 minutes to 15 minutes or so....then peel off to work. Whew. Too bad it isn't actually as much of an aerobic activity as it sounds cause I would be skinny minnie!
In order to fit in two training days during the week I must either get up way early...(I am talking 4:45 a.m. cause the hubby leaves at 5:15 a.m. and someone has to watch the child!).
OR....
Do this on my 45 minute lunch hour. Where? I don't know. I can't jog in the mall, they might think I am stealing. On the street? OK...maybe, but I am not sure my co-workers would enjoy the earthy sweatty scent of me after my run.
OR....
in the evening after I get home which is just the backward routine of the above earlier described routine...plus, my neighborhood is not lit and there are no sidewalks and there are loose junk yard dogs...and...need I go on?
I think my only option is to get up early. sigh. cry.
Friday, December 18, 2009
REjog/walk: My first 5K
With the help of my friend Stephanie (Mommy to Ella, Olivia's first and bestest friend) I have officially signed up for my first 5K at the Nashville Zoo's Zoo Run.
OMG!
http://www.nashvillezoo.org/events_detail.asp?eventID=5
omg.
wow.
Wahoooooo! Wa to the Hoooooo!
OMG!
http://www.nashvillezoo.org/events_detail.asp?eventID=5
omg.
wow.
Wahoooooo! Wa to the Hoooooo!
REally? Step on the scale?
Not too scary or condemning, but it is the cold hard truth.
173.6
Yikes.
My goal is 120.
I am feeling pretty vulnerable. I have posted unflattering pictures of myself and opened up the ugly truth of my food addiction...for anyone to see. My WW group is made up of my co-workers. I have prayerfully petitioned God. I believe that is more than enough accountability to succeed. Now the real work comes in to play. I can have all of the "atta girl pats on the back" that I desire but it is now up to me. I must journal, I must plan, I must make wise choices, and I must exercise. I must not completely deprive myself of something so as not to binge later but still use portion control. I can already hear some of you (and me) saying...just before Christmas??? Are you crazy? No. I think it is the perfect time to discipline myself because the focus (for me)on this time of year has become gluttony rather than the amazing Gift that I have received from my God. My Saviour.
173.6
Yikes.
My goal is 120.
I am feeling pretty vulnerable. I have posted unflattering pictures of myself and opened up the ugly truth of my food addiction...for anyone to see. My WW group is made up of my co-workers. I have prayerfully petitioned God. I believe that is more than enough accountability to succeed. Now the real work comes in to play. I can have all of the "atta girl pats on the back" that I desire but it is now up to me. I must journal, I must plan, I must make wise choices, and I must exercise. I must not completely deprive myself of something so as not to binge later but still use portion control. I can already hear some of you (and me) saying...just before Christmas??? Are you crazy? No. I think it is the perfect time to discipline myself because the focus (for me)on this time of year has become gluttony rather than the amazing Gift that I have received from my God. My Saviour.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
REcommit: this is it.
Weight Watchers countdown. The hard facts of my weight are about to be revealed. I am a bit scared. Just a bit. The truth can hurt. However, when you fall into a pit (or whole-heartedly jump in, I'm jest sayin') there are two things you can do. You can wallow in the pit, hang some pictures and feel right at home, or you can look up and reach up and let Him pull you out. Then, the hard work begins. I am ready for the hard work. I know I have at least a year ahead of me. Here's to the first real RE on my list. Cheers!
RE-commit to my health (fitness, food and fun)
I will post the weight later~
RE-commit to my health (fitness, food and fun)
I will post the weight later~
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
REmove thyself!!!!
The enemy is living in my breakroom at work. Evil lurks there. Shoot, lurks??? It is right out in the open. Waiting, calling to me...."Tina, come here....it won't hurt a bit. Weight Watchers does not officially start until tomorrow!" Donughts...I curse you and the baker who created you! I could truthfully inhale them. Ever want to know who ate ALL the donughts? Check my nose, you will find bits of glaze. I will eat the whole box, quickly. I know the headache is coming but I do it anyway. You know how a shark's eyes roll back when it is in a feeding frenzy? That's me when I approach donughts. Pretty scary. Weight Watchers....come quickly!!!!
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
REalize: 50 pounds
I just had the annual with the ob/gyn. She lovingly yet professionally confirmed my worst fear. No, not that fear! The other one...the one that says how much weight I need to lose. Yes, she confirmed it. Fifty. Fitty for all my homies out there. sigh. I knew that was number. I have many people that, when I say this number to them, go..."noooooo, fifty? maybe 20 or 30...but fifty? Where do you hide all of that?" Well, I can't tell you my secrets! But I am posting the above picture to prove my point. Yikes!
I was 120 when I married John. I was 120 on my first and most successful Weight Watchers membership. So, if I average out 3-4 pounds per month then that means I am looking at at least 1 year for this transformation. ONE YEAR. one year. one year....
Here is the bright side of it (there is always a bright side!). I will look FANTASTIC for the big 40 and running a 5K!
Monday, December 14, 2009
REncouraged
Here are some comments that have just blessed me. They were posted on Facebook or via email so I only used initials.
"Tina.....I was so touched by your blog! You and I are in the same boat that I have been in for way too long. The "weight boat" and I have been sinking it and myself. I share the same thoughts that you have shared and so disappointed in my lack of self-discipline. I never get further than good intentions. I never had a weight problem until after Connie and that's how long I have been "not happy with myself! That is a long time to let myself go. I will pray for us that we will be strong and do this thing together. You will be my accountability partner and I will be yours. Our bodies are temples and mine is in the "condemned category" right now! All things are possible in Christ. He is our strength when we are weak. Right now I hate clothes shopping. It is so depressing and I'm tired of feeling that way. Let's kick some butt and feel good about ourselves again. Yes, my butt is the place to start (ha ha).....Keeping you in prayer about this battle we are on! Love you Tina, girlfriend! – “P”
"you can do it!!!!" – “K”
"you can do it!!!! I will run the 5K with you!!!" – “S”
"i need to recommit to that too...you inspire me sista! your blog is a trip and I love it so much, is today your day 1 of the couch to 5 k? I decided since I home with **** anyway to start it again today...grrr...yes, I hate it, it is horrible....running stinks big time...but then again so does not fitting into my pants. " “J”
"You can DO IT! Just take your time and don't increase your pace and/or mileage too quickly. Sign up for a 5k to keep you motivated. Go, girl GO!" “T from Florida”
"awesome!" “C from Florida”
"Tina.....I was so touched by your blog! You and I are in the same boat that I have been in for way too long. The "weight boat" and I have been sinking it and myself. I share the same thoughts that you have shared and so disappointed in my lack of self-discipline. I never get further than good intentions. I never had a weight problem until after Connie and that's how long I have been "not happy with myself! That is a long time to let myself go. I will pray for us that we will be strong and do this thing together. You will be my accountability partner and I will be yours. Our bodies are temples and mine is in the "condemned category" right now! All things are possible in Christ. He is our strength when we are weak. Right now I hate clothes shopping. It is so depressing and I'm tired of feeling that way. Let's kick some butt and feel good about ourselves again. Yes, my butt is the place to start (ha ha).....Keeping you in prayer about this battle we are on! Love you Tina, girlfriend! – “P”
"you can do it!!!!" – “K”
"you can do it!!!! I will run the 5K with you!!!" – “S”
"i need to recommit to that too...you inspire me sista! your blog is a trip and I love it so much, is today your day 1 of the couch to 5 k? I decided since I home with **** anyway to start it again today...grrr...yes, I hate it, it is horrible....running stinks big time...but then again so does not fitting into my pants. " “J”
"You can DO IT! Just take your time and don't increase your pace and/or mileage too quickly. Sign up for a 5k to keep you motivated. Go, girl GO!" “T from Florida”
"awesome!" “C from Florida”
REvisit "the list."
I want to take pictures. Pretty pictures, with depth and meaning. Not just some amateur digital snapshot, but a real shot. A butterfly caught in motion, the serious look of Olivia when she is reading, the chipmunk I spy while out walking. I have always been drawn to photography. Could have been the influence of Nick Rhodes of Duran Duran. So much influence those boys had on me! Indiana Jones, James Bond, Roxy Music, Fedora's, guy-liner....ahh, good times, good times.
Continuing my list of goals:
1. Lose 50 pounds
2. Train for and complete a 5K on my 40th birthday (Thanksgiving 2010)
3. Take a photography class
4. Learn to sew
The 5k is the big one (the weight will drop if I train and run!)
Nashville has a Boulevard Bolt every year at Thanksgiving. My 40th birthday falls into that time frame. I think it is a $50 fee and that benefits Nashville's homeless. I have been checking out this site: www.coolrunning.com which has a program "from couch potato to 5K runner."
I don't run. I despise it. I don't run, not even in great times of fear. Let me explain what I mean when I say "I despise it." I am scared of it. Scared. It is too much work, it is hard, I have feet problems, back problems, asthma...which are all a direct result from being overweight and incredibly sedentary. I posted my goal on Facebook and was thrilled to hear from some friends with encouragement.
I must do this. I will do this. And who knows, I may even become a runner who actually likes it, possibly even loves it? If that ever happens, I will have to track down Mrs. Frank who was my P.E. coach in Jr. High. I refused to dress out and run. I walked. I barely passed her class. She didn't care for me too much! Sorry Mrs. Frank, sorry!
Continuing my list of goals:
1. Lose 50 pounds
2. Train for and complete a 5K on my 40th birthday (Thanksgiving 2010)
3. Take a photography class
4. Learn to sew
The 5k is the big one (the weight will drop if I train and run!)
Nashville has a Boulevard Bolt every year at Thanksgiving. My 40th birthday falls into that time frame. I think it is a $50 fee and that benefits Nashville's homeless. I have been checking out this site: www.coolrunning.com which has a program "from couch potato to 5K runner."
I don't run. I despise it. I don't run, not even in great times of fear. Let me explain what I mean when I say "I despise it." I am scared of it. Scared. It is too much work, it is hard, I have feet problems, back problems, asthma...which are all a direct result from being overweight and incredibly sedentary. I posted my goal on Facebook and was thrilled to hear from some friends with encouragement.
I must do this. I will do this. And who knows, I may even become a runner who actually likes it, possibly even loves it? If that ever happens, I will have to track down Mrs. Frank who was my P.E. coach in Jr. High. I refused to dress out and run. I walked. I barely passed her class. She didn't care for me too much! Sorry Mrs. Frank, sorry!
REdigest
Ever been thrilled to be back at work? I am, at least today I am! Last Thursday I was attacked by pizza. This weekend I decided to retaliate and attacked some cookies. Not just any cookies, Cookie Swap cookies. Lemon-Cranberry, Raspberry Thumbprint, Chocolate Chip, Heath Bar, Lemon Cake, Truffles, Peppermint Bark. Sigh. My Women's Community group met for a time of fellowship and cookies....I love those ladies! (and their cookies). Sigh.
I am trying not too beat my self up to bad....oh wait, I have another confession. Time to beat myself up. You can help out if you would like. McDonalds, #13. Don't know what it is about that processed and deep fried white fish on a bun with processed cheese and tartar (TARTAR!!!!) sauce that does me in. But, it did. Did me in. Done.
All because I was out during the lunch time with my precious three year old in the back seat who saw the golden arches and screamed....french fries mommy!!! Or was it me that screamed...french fries Olivia!!! I think it was the latter. Yep, it was me. Sigh.
So, today is a new day, a new Monday at work filled with structure and lo-carb yogurt and apples at my desk. Running shoes in the drawer along with comfy socks and my trusty MP3 player. Walk for 30 minutes. Start over. Weight Watchers starts Thursday. Maybe I can make up for the damage done over the weekend in the next few days so that I can still be in the 170's for my official weigh in. Double-sigh.
I am trying not too beat my self up to bad....oh wait, I have another confession. Time to beat myself up. You can help out if you would like. McDonalds, #13. Don't know what it is about that processed and deep fried white fish on a bun with processed cheese and tartar (TARTAR!!!!) sauce that does me in. But, it did. Did me in. Done.
All because I was out during the lunch time with my precious three year old in the back seat who saw the golden arches and screamed....french fries mommy!!! Or was it me that screamed...french fries Olivia!!! I think it was the latter. Yep, it was me. Sigh.
So, today is a new day, a new Monday at work filled with structure and lo-carb yogurt and apples at my desk. Running shoes in the drawer along with comfy socks and my trusty MP3 player. Walk for 30 minutes. Start over. Weight Watchers starts Thursday. Maybe I can make up for the damage done over the weekend in the next few days so that I can still be in the 170's for my official weigh in. Double-sigh.
Friday, December 11, 2009
REconnaissance: Attack of the Pizza
I should have seen it coming. I should have been prepared. Last night, I was attacked by three pieces of pepperoni pizza last night. I was overtaken quite quickly. Isn't there some sort of a self-defense class against crimes like this? Oh yeah....Weight Watchers meetings. Which leads me to the good news of yesterday. Several people at work have been trying to get Weight Watchers started at our office but they were lacking in enough people. I seriously thought about it, I have done WW before and it was very helpful. I got down to 120 pounds in 2001 and contribute my success to the WW program and meetings. However....money, like my belt, is tight. So I declined to join. Well, yesterday, I was notified that an anonymous gift was made so that I could join the meetings. I was overwhelmed with gratitude. Humbled. Wow. First meeting is next Thursday. The dreaded weigh-in will take place. I will bravely post that weight here. Did I just write that? Yes, I did. Accountability. Knowing that old highschool friends and current friends and family members and my church family will possibly read this....that is enough of a kick in the booty to work towards lowering that number.
My goal: 120 lbs, and, to run in the Boulevard Bolt 5K on my 40th birthday in 2010.
My goal: 120 lbs, and, to run in the Boulevard Bolt 5K on my 40th birthday in 2010.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
REfocus: right here, right now.
four pounds down...yes!
I have found creative ways to fit in my walks such as the grocery store and circling the entire bottom suite of my workplace. That one was a bit difficult as it only took about 40 seconds to complete the circle. That is a LOT of loops which led to a bit of boredom and a dizzy spell!
It has only been two weeks, but I have been able to keep my commitments. It is difficult not to look ahead to where I want to be and see all that I must do in between. I am trying to live it one day each day. Chantel Hobbs has a great book, The One Day Way, which speaks to this point.
You can't allow the work that must be done to overwhelm you. It only creates the best excuse to stop. SO today, I will focus on the 30 minute walk and know that it is enough for today.
I have found creative ways to fit in my walks such as the grocery store and circling the entire bottom suite of my workplace. That one was a bit difficult as it only took about 40 seconds to complete the circle. That is a LOT of loops which led to a bit of boredom and a dizzy spell!
It has only been two weeks, but I have been able to keep my commitments. It is difficult not to look ahead to where I want to be and see all that I must do in between. I am trying to live it one day each day. Chantel Hobbs has a great book, The One Day Way, which speaks to this point.
You can't allow the work that must be done to overwhelm you. It only creates the best excuse to stop. SO today, I will focus on the 30 minute walk and know that it is enough for today.
Monday, December 7, 2009
REthink shopping on Senior Day at Kroger
I needed to hit the grocery store on my lunch hour for healthy food since I didn't prepare my lunch for today. I decided that I would head to Kroger for my rabbit food but would walk the store for 30 minutes before picking up my salad fixin's. I was in for quite a workout! The seniors were out in droves and I felt like I was on a simulation course for the DMV. I would be picking up speed in the dairy section when out of the cereal aisle would come a mini cart. That is all I saw, the mini cart! Dodged it within an inch of my life, almost scuffed up my new shoes! Headed down to the freezer section and there were more mini carts with seniors whippin' up a collision course for me! I went this way and I went that way....they kept at me. Come to think of it, I felt more like I was in a game of Frogger than a DMV simulation course! I must have come into the 1/2 way mark of my work out during the shift change because the spry seniors disappeared and the go carts came at me...you know, the ones that have a car or a bus attached to the cart....stay at home moms with their toddlers were everywhere! I must say though, I enjoyed the challenge and my butt will surely benefit from it! Dodge ball anyone?
Friday, December 4, 2009
REgress.
I have been pretty faithful to my goals of eating healthier and becoming active (REcommit)... until yesterday. I had a stressful morning at work. I have a huge project that should have been completed on Tuesday but due to one important piece that I am waiting on, it is still just sitting on my desk. Waiting to be collated and stuffed and mailed. So, instead of heading out to the mall for my 30 minute walk, I waited around my desk like an attention deprived puppy....
(mistake #1....letting someone other than God and my goals determine my action)
For dinner, I had a huge (and I mean huge...probably triple what I should have had) plate of pasta. (mistake #2...eating big amounts of the white stuff)
sigh.
BUT....not defeated, today is a new day and I am determined to follow the path God has set out before me. I have a goal of being active 3o minutes per day and today I will do just that.
P.S. I did my 3o minutes at the mall, I finished my project and now the weekend is mine! I have a Thirty-One party tomorrow and am very much looking forward to that!
(mistake #1....letting someone other than God and my goals determine my action)
For dinner, I had a huge (and I mean huge...probably triple what I should have had) plate of pasta. (mistake #2...eating big amounts of the white stuff)
sigh.
BUT....not defeated, today is a new day and I am determined to follow the path God has set out before me. I have a goal of being active 3o minutes per day and today I will do just that.
P.S. I did my 3o minutes at the mall, I finished my project and now the weekend is mine! I have a Thirty-One party tomorrow and am very much looking forward to that!
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
RErun: Did I say that out loud?
(Wed morning....)
It is raining again. Clouds in my coffee, clouds in my head, clouds in the sky....can I go back to bed?
Watched The Biggest Loser last night. What an episode. I secretly have dreamed of running in a marathon and the final four contestants did just that. 26.2 miles without training specifically for that very run, and they all did it. I hate running. Could I ever love it? I don't run. Not even in times of great fear. Really, can't you just see it? The monster that lives under children's beds and in their closets is chasing me down a dark alley....and I am speed walking! Bahhh haaa haa haaa! "Whatever happened to Tina? Oh, last I heard she was briskly walking to escape the monster....she refused to give in to her pride and would not run."
(Wed evening...)
Women's Community was a lot of fun tonight. Half of our group was not able to attend but we had fun. There was an Ugly Christmas Sweater Contest. Normally I am extremely competitive. But I sat this one out. Growing up in Florida with a Mom who makes you dress up in matching sweaters for the annual Christmas picture will do that to you! Of course, I have to give my Moo Moo some props....we always did have a very coordinated matching and festive picture! I have to brag a little, I won a door prize! I never win anything!!!! It was a lovely coffee mug from Harry & David's, along with a gift card to the store. Watch out "Avenue" here I come!
(later in the evening...)
Coffee with Erin at Joezarra's. Really fun little coffee house. Our lattes were served up warm and frothy in big fat ceramic mugs. Great conversation with my precious friend. I have to report, that I was not hungry and did not eat. And...even better, I did not sample any of the petite desserts at WC....I did look. But I didn't eat! Wasn't hungry (car is stocked with healthy treats for occasions such as this!)
It is raining again. Clouds in my coffee, clouds in my head, clouds in the sky....can I go back to bed?
Watched The Biggest Loser last night. What an episode. I secretly have dreamed of running in a marathon and the final four contestants did just that. 26.2 miles without training specifically for that very run, and they all did it. I hate running. Could I ever love it? I don't run. Not even in times of great fear. Really, can't you just see it? The monster that lives under children's beds and in their closets is chasing me down a dark alley....and I am speed walking! Bahhh haaa haa haaa! "Whatever happened to Tina? Oh, last I heard she was briskly walking to escape the monster....she refused to give in to her pride and would not run."
(Wed evening...)
Women's Community was a lot of fun tonight. Half of our group was not able to attend but we had fun. There was an Ugly Christmas Sweater Contest. Normally I am extremely competitive. But I sat this one out. Growing up in Florida with a Mom who makes you dress up in matching sweaters for the annual Christmas picture will do that to you! Of course, I have to give my Moo Moo some props....we always did have a very coordinated matching and festive picture! I have to brag a little, I won a door prize! I never win anything!!!! It was a lovely coffee mug from Harry & David's, along with a gift card to the store. Watch out "Avenue" here I come!
(later in the evening...)
Coffee with Erin at Joezarra's. Really fun little coffee house. Our lattes were served up warm and frothy in big fat ceramic mugs. Great conversation with my precious friend. I have to report, that I was not hungry and did not eat. And...even better, I did not sample any of the petite desserts at WC....I did look. But I didn't eat! Wasn't hungry (car is stocked with healthy treats for occasions such as this!)
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
REplay: When will the bootay stop movin'?
Yesterday was so gloomy but I walked. I needed to use my inhaler afterwards (pollen season is soooo bad here in TN), but I walked. I braved the crowds at the Green Hills Mall, left my debit card at work because I can barely afford a tea from Teavanna let alone anything from MAC, Burberry, Janie and Jack, L'Occitane...etc. But I walked. The MP3 player is loaded and ready for any walking situation. Beyonce, Dixie Chicks, Duran Duran, Toby Mac, Sade (great cool down) Queen, etc. Today was a nicer day and although the allergies are ever present...I walked outside. It was a good walk. As I walked I pondered two things, will I ever graduate to more than a 30 minute walk? And, will my butt ever get to the point that it stops moving when I stop moving???? Just askin'.
Monday, November 30, 2009
REport.
Monday...a gloomy, cold and rainy day. I have suffered with allergies and asthma since my big walk on Thursday morning which was cold and windy...pollen count was not good, however I was unaware of this until a couple of hours after the walk when I felt like I was breathing through a coffee stirrer!
Due to the above, I did not walk or exercise on Saturday or Sunday. Today is a new day as my dear friend Jessica reminded me during our check-in this morning when I confessed to her that I laid low over the weekend. No fear, I will be walking on my lunch hour at the mall.
And, is it just my imagination or are my size 16's feeling a teensy less tight? It has only been a week but I swear there is at least a an extra centimeter of room in there that was not there last week!
I can faithfully report with all honesty that I did quite well with my eating this past week. I did have seconds at Thanksgiving and a piece of my Coconut Cream Poke Cake. I did not have birthday cake or any other sweets period. When the fam had taco's I made it into a salad and left out the tortilla shell, when the fam had chips, salsa and cheese, I left out the cheese. Feelin' strong. Feelin' a bit victorious and celebratory!
Can I get a "woooo hooooo?" anyone?
Due to the above, I did not walk or exercise on Saturday or Sunday. Today is a new day as my dear friend Jessica reminded me during our check-in this morning when I confessed to her that I laid low over the weekend. No fear, I will be walking on my lunch hour at the mall.
And, is it just my imagination or are my size 16's feeling a teensy less tight? It has only been a week but I swear there is at least a an extra centimeter of room in there that was not there last week!
I can faithfully report with all honesty that I did quite well with my eating this past week. I did have seconds at Thanksgiving and a piece of my Coconut Cream Poke Cake. I did not have birthday cake or any other sweets period. When the fam had taco's I made it into a salad and left out the tortilla shell, when the fam had chips, salsa and cheese, I left out the cheese. Feelin' strong. Feelin' a bit victorious and celebratory!
Can I get a "woooo hooooo?" anyone?
Sunday, November 29, 2009
RE: The List.
A few of the things on my list:
REcommit
I want to be healthy. For my family I want to provide healthy yet tasty meals and snacks. Tofu? Nah, don't think so. Not in this house! My husband and daughter know the difference between ground beef and ground turkey, no matter how much Pampered Chef Southwestern seasonings I throw in there!
REorganize
I have too much stuff. I have trouble throwing things away. I have piles here and there. I think I need to organize the piles so that I can actualy organize! My piles? Receipts, items for Liv's scrapbook, pictures, books, music, my Thirty-One business supplies, Women's Community materials. Then, there are the clothes. The skinny ones....yes, at one time, I wore a size 8. It was the year leading up to meeting my husband. Ahhhh, brown suede jeans, I remember you fondly...you were there the night I learned to do the Sweetheart Shadas (sp?) and you were there on my first date with John. How could I ever part with you?
Oh yeah....and then there are the remnants from my six years of selling Pampered Chef. I can still find unique uses for all 17 pieces of stoneware....how could I give up the mini loaf pan? That is vital for holiday baking (that I haven't had the time to do since Liv arrived).
My highschool yearbooks are out of the hope chest...although bulky and taking up quite a bit of space, they are completely necessary for my Facebook research...who was that that just "friended" me? Oh yes, 10th grade English!
REmodel a role model for Olivia
OK...so we are sitting at the dinner table and Olivia doesn't like what I have cooked...surprise! She decides that she must leave the table. I explain the rule, whether we eat or not, we sit as a family until we are all done....be happy darned it!!!! To which she exclaims in her most dramatic voice (I think she is going to be an actress....) "I need to relax on the couch, I am not feeling good...I think I am sick." Now, for most people, this might be kind of cute. But for me, it was like daggers to my heart. How many times have I said that very thing? Many. She is a sponge. Ouch.
Well...these are just a few. But they are a great start. Comments? Anyone?
REcommit
I want to be healthy. For my family I want to provide healthy yet tasty meals and snacks. Tofu? Nah, don't think so. Not in this house! My husband and daughter know the difference between ground beef and ground turkey, no matter how much Pampered Chef Southwestern seasonings I throw in there!
REorganize
I have too much stuff. I have trouble throwing things away. I have piles here and there. I think I need to organize the piles so that I can actualy organize! My piles? Receipts, items for Liv's scrapbook, pictures, books, music, my Thirty-One business supplies, Women's Community materials. Then, there are the clothes. The skinny ones....yes, at one time, I wore a size 8. It was the year leading up to meeting my husband. Ahhhh, brown suede jeans, I remember you fondly...you were there the night I learned to do the Sweetheart Shadas (sp?) and you were there on my first date with John. How could I ever part with you?
Oh yeah....and then there are the remnants from my six years of selling Pampered Chef. I can still find unique uses for all 17 pieces of stoneware....how could I give up the mini loaf pan? That is vital for holiday baking (that I haven't had the time to do since Liv arrived).
My highschool yearbooks are out of the hope chest...although bulky and taking up quite a bit of space, they are completely necessary for my Facebook research...who was that that just "friended" me? Oh yes, 10th grade English!
REmodel a role model for Olivia
OK...so we are sitting at the dinner table and Olivia doesn't like what I have cooked...surprise! She decides that she must leave the table. I explain the rule, whether we eat or not, we sit as a family until we are all done....be happy darned it!!!! To which she exclaims in her most dramatic voice (I think she is going to be an actress....) "I need to relax on the couch, I am not feeling good...I think I am sick." Now, for most people, this might be kind of cute. But for me, it was like daggers to my heart. How many times have I said that very thing? Many. She is a sponge. Ouch.
Well...these are just a few. But they are a great start. Comments? Anyone?
Friday, November 27, 2009
REinspired
Took this on a recent walk...found it symbolic that this little sweet yellow flower was striving to stay above the pile of old and dead leaves that had surrounded her. That is me. I took it as a "God Wink".
REally great birthday
Today John and Olivia surprised me with presents. As requested, truthfully requested by me...NO Birthday Cake was present! There was the little cupcake that my sweet co-worker gave me on Wednesday that I gave to Olivia and John to enjoy. It didn't hurt...really!
The gift that touched me the most was a pink water bottle and a card from John...It said "May all of your changes come true..." Ahhh, sweet boy. He is listening! I needs me a stylin H2O container to work it 30 minutes daily!
They took me to lunch at one of my faves, Demos, and I left the bread alone. Funny how much more salad and soup you can enjoy when the bread isn't taking up all of the room Elmo card from Liv!
Then we embarked on a 30 minute walk. It was not brisk due to my head cold and having great difficulty breathing through my nose, but, I DID IT. I kept to my goal of 30 minutes daily. And John and Olivia were right there with me, rooting me on.
The gift that touched me the most was a pink water bottle and a card from John...It said "May all of your changes come true..." Ahhh, sweet boy. He is listening! I needs me a stylin H2O container to work it 30 minutes daily!
They took me to lunch at one of my faves, Demos, and I left the bread alone. Funny how much more salad and soup you can enjoy when the bread isn't taking up all of the room Elmo card from Liv!
Then we embarked on a 30 minute walk. It was not brisk due to my head cold and having great difficulty breathing through my nose, but, I DID IT. I kept to my goal of 30 minutes daily. And John and Olivia were right there with me, rooting me on.
REstart: Today begins my journey to 40
It's my birthday....it's my birthday!
So, this is it. I have thinking about this day for a couple of months now. Today starts my re-everything. My first committment is my health which includes being active and mindful in my exercise and eating. I am ready for this challenge. I know I am jumping wwwwwaaaaayyyyyy ahead, but I actually thought...could I, someday, run a marathon? A little one? After reading Ali Vincent's book "Be It, Believe It" I feel a teensy glimmer of hope. She wrote about trying everything at least once. I wonder......
For now, I will stick to the 30 minutes a day. That is enough of a challenge for me at this stage. My devotion this morning was about PREPARATION (there is a "re" in there!)
Ephesians 2:10 (New International Version)
10 For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
2 Timothy 2:21 (New International Version)
21 If a man cleanses himself from the latter, he will be an instrument for noble purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.
They both speak loudly to me. This first one made me think of the role model I will become for Olivia who watches me and repeats everything I do. The second one made think about the possible marathon some day...
So, this is it. I have thinking about this day for a couple of months now. Today starts my re-everything. My first committment is my health which includes being active and mindful in my exercise and eating. I am ready for this challenge. I know I am jumping wwwwwaaaaayyyyyy ahead, but I actually thought...could I, someday, run a marathon? A little one? After reading Ali Vincent's book "Be It, Believe It" I feel a teensy glimmer of hope. She wrote about trying everything at least once. I wonder......
For now, I will stick to the 30 minutes a day. That is enough of a challenge for me at this stage. My devotion this morning was about PREPARATION (there is a "re" in there!)
Ephesians 2:10 (New International Version)
10 For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
2 Timothy 2:21 (New International Version)
21 If a man cleanses himself from the latter, he will be an instrument for noble purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.
They both speak loudly to me. This first one made me think of the role model I will become for Olivia who watches me and repeats everything I do. The second one made think about the possible marathon some day...
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
RE: the beginning of the journey
Re-invent
Re-pent
Re-work it
Re-move it
Re-do it
Re-organize
Re-juvenate
The year of the "re".
I am embarking upon my 39th birthday, this weekend to be exact. And I am not happy. Not with the fact that I am turning 39, but with me. Who I am , or who I am not, at this age. REmembering back to when I was a little girl. Even amidst the chaos and instability that I was raised in...I still wanted to be something special. What little girl doesn't? I didn't have a dad growing up. Oh, I had daddies...a few. But not a father. So, I didn't have that relationship to model my future husband after. I wasn't the apple of someone's eye. I didn't have a male protector. But I did have my moo-moo (my affectionate name for my mom) and my little sister. I grew up knowing a lot of what I didn't want. But somehow, I managed to gain just that, a lot of what I didn't want: weight and insecurity.
Overweight, out of shape and lots of work to do.
So, I can look at this, my fortieth year, as a sad thing...as a "look where I am, nowhere" or...
I can ....RE. I can "re" a lot of things that make me unhappy. Why, why, why should I be unhappy? I have a loving husband and a precious daughter. A thriving business, an amazing church family, friends and family...
I must begin to like me. I must create the change that I want to see. Then and only then will I start to like me and finally, love me. The things that I am blessed with, they are blessings, but they can't make me "do it." That is up to me.
My most important Re's:
1. God, my relationship with HIM (re-connecting and re-deepening)
2. My husband (re-ignite)
3. My daughter (re-model a role model for her)
The rest, well...it is up to me, I mean, RE.
My first re. RE-Commit to my health
I am overweight. By a lot. According to the doc, I could lose 50 lbs. Yes...I could actually qualify for candidacy on the Biggest Loser. Which brings me to my a-ha "re" moment. I had felt a stirring for quite some time that some changes needed to take place. Lots of changes. But I would get so overwhelmed with how much I wanted to do. Last week, I read that Ali Vincent, the First Female Biggest Loser, would be at a book signing at a book store very close to where I work. It was scheduled for 7pm. I wanted to go, I felt a strange urge, a pulling, that I must go. However, my three-year old daughter would have to come with me. Her preschool is right around the corner from where I work and closes at 6pm. My husband was recovering from surgery so he would not be in the best position to care for her...and it was an hour commute, minimum, to get home. So, I braved it. Picked Liv up and went to McDonald's (yeah, I know....bad choice) and had some dinner. Then we hit the book store. I was filled with excitement and so was Olivia. So much that she had a hard time containing it. Looking back, I feel bad for expecting so much out of her. She is only three. She actually did very well for the anti-child environment I put her in. You know where I am coming from....lots of adults, single, or child-less for the evening. Turning and looking at you because your child is not perfectly still and quiet. Sigh. But, we endured. I got to hear most of what Ali was saying. Several things resonated with me
The picture is priceless....She is in her gorgeous outfit and pretty booming smile and I am holding a less than thrilled child and my make-up is nowhere to be found after the three mini nervous breakdowns I had throughout the evening!
The next day I made a pact with my dear friend Jessica to be active for at least 30 minutes per day for six days a week. After that visit I took Olivia to the Greenway for a 30 minute walk. Been walkin' ever since.
*Overcame the temptation of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies last night and a birthday cupcake from a sweet co-worker today (in honor of the large 39 coming up!)
Change is happening. It has only been a few days. But, I feel something inside of me that I have never felt before. Determination. Procrastination has always been a problem of mine. Did you know that "Tina" is Procrastination's middle name? Really...look!
Re-pent
Re-work it
Re-move it
Re-do it
Re-organize
Re-juvenate
The year of the "re".
I am embarking upon my 39th birthday, this weekend to be exact. And I am not happy. Not with the fact that I am turning 39, but with me. Who I am , or who I am not, at this age. REmembering back to when I was a little girl. Even amidst the chaos and instability that I was raised in...I still wanted to be something special. What little girl doesn't? I didn't have a dad growing up. Oh, I had daddies...a few. But not a father. So, I didn't have that relationship to model my future husband after. I wasn't the apple of someone's eye. I didn't have a male protector. But I did have my moo-moo (my affectionate name for my mom) and my little sister. I grew up knowing a lot of what I didn't want. But somehow, I managed to gain just that, a lot of what I didn't want: weight and insecurity.
Overweight, out of shape and lots of work to do.
So, I can look at this, my fortieth year, as a sad thing...as a "look where I am, nowhere" or...
I can ....RE. I can "re" a lot of things that make me unhappy. Why, why, why should I be unhappy? I have a loving husband and a precious daughter. A thriving business, an amazing church family, friends and family...
I must begin to like me. I must create the change that I want to see. Then and only then will I start to like me and finally, love me. The things that I am blessed with, they are blessings, but they can't make me "do it." That is up to me.
My most important Re's:
1. God, my relationship with HIM (re-connecting and re-deepening)
2. My husband (re-ignite)
3. My daughter (re-model a role model for her)
The rest, well...it is up to me, I mean, RE.
My first re. RE-Commit to my health
I am overweight. By a lot. According to the doc, I could lose 50 lbs. Yes...I could actually qualify for candidacy on the Biggest Loser. Which brings me to my a-ha "re" moment. I had felt a stirring for quite some time that some changes needed to take place. Lots of changes. But I would get so overwhelmed with how much I wanted to do. Last week, I read that Ali Vincent, the First Female Biggest Loser, would be at a book signing at a book store very close to where I work. It was scheduled for 7pm. I wanted to go, I felt a strange urge, a pulling, that I must go. However, my three-year old daughter would have to come with me. Her preschool is right around the corner from where I work and closes at 6pm. My husband was recovering from surgery so he would not be in the best position to care for her...and it was an hour commute, minimum, to get home. So, I braved it. Picked Liv up and went to McDonald's (yeah, I know....bad choice) and had some dinner. Then we hit the book store. I was filled with excitement and so was Olivia. So much that she had a hard time containing it. Looking back, I feel bad for expecting so much out of her. She is only three. She actually did very well for the anti-child environment I put her in. You know where I am coming from....lots of adults, single, or child-less for the evening. Turning and looking at you because your child is not perfectly still and quiet. Sigh. But, we endured. I got to hear most of what Ali was saying. Several things resonated with me
- She had a very similiar upbringing
- She realized while wearing a size 18, that her clothes were cutting into her skin. Right there with ya babe...size 16 is killing me.
- She achieved what I would like to achieve. Living a sedentary life style and turned it in to an active one. Living proof that I could do it
- She reminded us that we have to love ourselves. Love myself? I barely like myself. Is that the missing link for me?
The picture is priceless....She is in her gorgeous outfit and pretty booming smile and I am holding a less than thrilled child and my make-up is nowhere to be found after the three mini nervous breakdowns I had throughout the evening!
Liv, Me and Ali Vincent 11/20/09
The next day I made a pact with my dear friend Jessica to be active for at least 30 minutes per day for six days a week. After that visit I took Olivia to the Greenway for a 30 minute walk. Been walkin' ever since.
*Overcame the temptation of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies last night and a birthday cupcake from a sweet co-worker today (in honor of the large 39 coming up!)
Change is happening. It has only been a few days. But, I feel something inside of me that I have never felt before. Determination. Procrastination has always been a problem of mine. Did you know that "Tina" is Procrastination's middle name? Really...look!
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